My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
