Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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