did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize