Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
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