Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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