Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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