I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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