Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize