I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
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