Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
