airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
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Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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