I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize