I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
