This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
