She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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