its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
