I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
