this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
