he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I came so hard my ears popped.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
