A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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