Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
