Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
