I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
