nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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