Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
