We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
