i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize