I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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