we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
