i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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