Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
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