I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
