Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
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