Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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