It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I can feel your judgement through the phone
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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