This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino