we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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