Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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