Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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