She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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