was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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