she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
You can't just leave with hair like that
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
