You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize