she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Sorry about my life...
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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