The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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