real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
