is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
