if you like me you must not know who I am
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize