Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize