Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
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